by Sue Gillespie (Grandma Sue)
My 4 year old, Carolyn, was just getting the hang of various measurements. She walked up to grandpa with a tape measure. She stretched it out as long as she could, and announced, “You weigh…5 o’clock!” A tape measure, a scale and a clock….all mixed up together! But from her perspective - it made perfect sense.
PERSPECTIVE is a beautiful thing. And your perspective on your circumstances plays a huge part in how you will handle ‘life’.
Ever worked on a jig-saw puzzle? You can pick up one piece and study it very closely…but have NO idea where it fits into the puzzle. Then, as the puzzle comes together, it’s more obvious where it belongs. As each piece is snapped into place – the full picture shows up – and ..tada….something beautiful.
When you have an experience that appears – in your view – to be negative – it will look like one puzzle piece. If you look too closely at it, you’ll have NO idea why it happened or how it could possibly ‘fit’ into your life. It might leave you confused, angry, jealous or deeply hurt. Thoughts like: ‘life’s not fair’ – or ‘ this is messing up my whole life’ – or ‘how could God let this happen’ – can overwhelm you.
I took a walk one day during a discouraging time. My problem seemed bigger than I could handle. I walked with my head down, my thoughts swirling and my eyes blankly staring at the sidewalk below my feet – feeling very alone. An unusual sound caught my attention. I looked up. There it was: sunshine, blue sky, the clouds, birds darting from tree to tree and beautiful flowers in bloom all around me. I instinctively took a deep breath, closed my eyes and relaxed my shoulders. My mind quieted and I said out loud, “Oh yeah! There is a God.” The beautiful creation around me reminded me that my Creator was right there with me on my walk. He hadn’t abandon me. He was big enough to handle my problems – and I could trust Him.
My PERSPECTIVE had changed. I was looking at a bigger picture…not my confusing puzzle piece.
REFRAMING is a great word to describe this change of perspective. When you feel overwhelmed – REFRAME. Get a different perspective.
Need to REFRAME? Here are a few techniques to get you started:
- Look behind the anger. Anger can cover -up and keep you from digging any deeper. It’s usually NOT the specific circumstances of a situation that’s frustrating you. It’s deeper than that. It will have to do with the meaning of that situation to you that will drive the strong emotion.
- Are you believing truth or a lie? If the meaning of the situation is not based on God’s truth (Example: “I don’t matter.” – “I’m not loved.” – “I can’t do anything right.” etc) ask God to show you what is true.
- Look at your situation as if it was happening to someone else.
- Be open to asking someone for their perspective on what’s happening to you.
- Look for the blessing hidden inside the trauma. (This isn’t a flippant – pat answer. Until you can see the ‘good’ in what you are going through, you will feel tangled in the pain and anger.)
Sue is a Craniosacral Therapist and Foot Reflexologist and is the author of
Books available at: www.grandma-sue.com