Ask Gramma Good: Dating After Divorce

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Dating after divorce is tough, but being in the dark about a relationship is even more difficult. Let’s help one gramma see the light.

Dear Gramma Good,

I’m a 46-year-old, divorced mother of three grown children and grandmother to four grandkids. I have been divorced for 22 years now, and haven’t had a date or relationship in over five years. No sex of anything during this time. About a week and a half ago, I found out that a man I have known for about seven months shares a mutual attraction. We began talking after I gave him my phone number. Things seemed really great. We talked every day. I never once initiated contact. He was in New York on business during this entire time. When he returned, we continued talking and things seemed to be moving forward. Two days ago, he came into the restaurant where I work and was so loving and high schooly. He messaged me after he left that he had just wanted grab me, pick me up, and kiss me, and to meet him outside when I got done working. (He works right next door.) Anyway, later that day I lost my job. I went next door, we sat in my truck and talked for about an hour. He kissed me, and we continued kissing and talking for a while. Then, that night, he stopped talking, wouldn’t respond to my messages, nothing. I have come to the deduction that given the conversations we had, that he likes me more than he thought he did and it scared him. He came out of a bad relationship about six months ago, and says he doesn’t want a relationship for one year. What should I deduce from all this? Is he running? I have been out of the “game” for quite a while and don’t know what to think. Could you offer some advice for a lonely grandma looking for love?

Dear Lonely Gramma,

You are smarter than you think because ‘you’ answered your question. So remember to value yourself and your thoughts.

You can wonder and wonder what is going on in his mind or you can ask him. I would contact him and use your own words. “I have been out of the dating game for a very long time and do not know what to think since I have not heard back from you.” And then add: “I would appreciate you telling me what’s on your mind.”

If you hear from him hopefully you will you like what he says (do not kid yourself) and follow your intuition. If you do not hear from him – forget him.

I have learned over the years to face situations head–on. It is better to know even if you do not like the outcome. It allows you to concentrate on important things: finding a new job, your loving family and your own well-being. Remember you are a valuable person.

Please let me know how everything works out.

Do Something GOOD today: We often need help from an outside source. Let Ask Gramma Good be your source. If you have a question for Gramma Good, ask here.

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