Tips for Staying Engaged with Your Adult Kids And Grandkids
BY Dr. Pat Hanson
- Keep judgments to yourself. I keep my heart open but mouth closed as I observe two very different parenting styles in my grandchildren’s homes. Notice what you think and feel, but unless you observe something dangerous happening, silence it
- Your adult children don’t always need or want advice, but everyone needs encouragement. Sympathize with them about the difficulties of childraising and simply tell them they’re doing a great job.
- Worry gets you nowhere. Every time fear slips in, as it will, try affirmative prayer. Your children’s pathways may not be yours, but honor them. Replacing negative thoughts with positive ones isn’t easy, but it can help reduce fear and keep you open to love.
- Express love often. Enjoy every precious minute of your time with them. Know that everyone expresses love in different ways. Find your way and show your love. Now more than ever, it is vital for all of us to be the PEACE, and be the CHANGE the world needs. Our growing grandchildren and their adult parents are our future!
- Alienated Grandparents Anonymous (aga-fl.org) support groups in 50 states and 17 countries, how to start your own, reconciliation success stories
- Joshua Coleman’s When Parents Hurt: Compassionate Strategies When You and Your Grown Child Don’t Get Along © 2008. Free weekly q & a, webinars.
- 60 Minutes reporter Lesley Stahl’s Becoming Grandma reminds us that our adult children parent differently than we did.
- When Being a Grandma Isn’t So Grand: The 4 Keys to L.O.V.E. Your Grandchild’s Parents by Donne Davis ©2013 (link to GaGa Sisterhood) Tips for handling our feelings
- Use social media and those invisible grandkids may look you up someday. www.GrandparentsAcademy.com educates and empowers grandparents to connect with their loved ones
- Susan Hoffman, A Precious Bond and Grand Wishes: Advocating to Preserve the Grandparent Grandchild Bond and founder of Advocates for Grandparent-Grandchild Connection, resources for families experiencing visitation issues with grandchildren. http://www.grandparentchildconnect.org
About the Author – Dr. Pat Hanson
Dr. Pat Hanson is a seasoned health educator, public speaker, and workshop facilitator. She is the author of Invisible Grandparenting: Leave A Legacy Of Love Whether You Can Be There or Not. She lectures nationally on Aging Positively and is a columnist for the magazine: Crone: Women Coming of Age