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CONFESSION: I didn’t want grandkids

TRUE CONFESSIONS: I didn’t want grandkids

But, my grandkids saved me from myself


After they’re born, everything changes.

I didn’t want grandkids born into the world we presently live in, with an unstable government, ISIS, shootings, bombings, bullying in schools, and compromised morality.

Plus, I didn’t think I liked kids anymore.  Let’s face it, kids are not what they used to be. In my last teaching job, a class of kindergarteners, I heard language I had never dreamed of hearing – and I am not a sheltered adult. Maybe I was no longer cut out to enjoy children.

Could I handle being called Grams, Grandma, Grand-mère? How old would that make me feel?

I had grown impatient with my neighborhood kids making noises outside my window. Do they really need to emit high-pitched screams when they play?

Or maybe it was because I didn’t want to get any older. Could I handle being called Grams, Grandma, Grand-mère? How old would that make me feel?  Would having grandkids lead to being called… a “senior citizen?”

Little Ellie

While I pondered these obstacles to grandmotherhood, my granddaughter, Ellie, was born.  That vulnerable, defenseless little being played with my unsuspecting heart. In an instant, I knew I could take down Goliath with a slingshot. I began to plot how to capture her enemies and put them in locked cells. I decided to start a daily prayer vigil against any and all dangers.

Every baby became a precious bundle, every child, God’s happiest creation.

Little Sean

Then little Sean came out of the womb, sobbing because he had lost his safe, quiet shelter from the storm – blinding hospital lights and nurses chattering on and on. (FaceTime and video are a blessing only some of the time.)

I was ready to disguise myself, break-in, and rescue him. My daughter, of course, would have been quite upset about that. She was having a wonderful time, playing mom for the first time. I settled for deleting all the first hour photos and videos and started with the one of him swaddled and sleeping peacefully.

Now every little girl is a precious flower.

Now every little boy is smart, sassy, and strong.

Thank God. My grandchildren rescued me from becoming a nasty, kid-hating old lady.


GRANDKIDSKaye Curren has returned to writing after 30 years of raising two husbands, two children, two teenage stepchildren, three horses, umpteen dogs and cats, and several non-speaking parakeets. She used to write computer manuals but now writes humor, essays, and memoir.  Her essays appear on,,,, and Find her other musings on her website/blog at

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