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Posted on June 24, 2018 by Christine Crosby in children, families, migrants, thoughts

Here Are My Thoughts About Separating Children From Their Families

Here are my thoughts

In response to our last week’s newsletter, we received many thoughtful responses. We have not deleted or left any out. There were many more who responded via our Facebook page. You may see more there.

What has distinguished us, the American people, for generations as a country has not been politics, but our working together from a place of integrity and human decency.

We, the American people, make this country great…..but only when we keep our politicians in check, reminding them, all the way up to the Presidency, that they are not our rulers, but our representatives.

When is all the blaming from both sides going to stop?  Forget Republican/Democrat labels.  We’re Americans. Secure our borders humanely. Remember who we are as Americans.  Or is this what we have become?

I congratulate you on speaking out.

Angie Mangino


I agree that these poor families face desperate situations. The answers are complicated for everyone.

Rosemary McKinley

Thank you for this, it is  clear and beautifully written, and an eloquent statement of decent humane values that I hope are the bedrock of American culture.  Our country cannot survive on  not brutalizing  children. I am grateful to you for taking stand on this and helping others to do so.

Becky Sarah – Author of “Grandmothering: Real Life in Real Families

You can stop sending me the Grand Magazine if you are going to comment, post, etc. your political views.  By posting Laura Bush’s comments proves to me what side of the fence you are on the subject.  There are so many factors to be looked at. 

Eileen M. Howe

This is inhuman and should be stopped right away.  President Trump should use his heart first and head after.


It is said that a nation is defined by how it treats and respects the unfortunate. I am embarrassed to say that I am an American in light of this policy of separating children from parents. These folks are refugees in great need whose worst sin is desire for a better life. Please continue to shout out for the family…it is the strength of country!

Lucy Cortese

My heart is broken over the treatment of these sweet children.  This president doesn’t seem to have a heart.  I am so saddened by it all.

Y Buss

I think that everyone needs to get their facts straight as to what is and isn’t actually happening before spreading political B.S.  I think that the charitable organizations that are getting involved in this need to put American children first.  I think that, if you choose to drag you (or someone else’s) child across the border illegally, you should expect that you will suffer the consequences – perhaps you should think about that BEFORE putting your child in such a situation.  There are hundreds of thousands of American children in foster care because their parents committed a crime and are incarcerated as punishment for that crime.  Where is the alarm where those children are concerned?

H Campers

Thank you for taking this stand. Your point that you are not playing politics but simply being consistent in your pro-family stance is compelling. Would that Republicans—the “family values” party—had the courage to speak up.

Stephen Sapp

Laura Bush was pitch and word perfect. It is shameful to use children as pawns to make a deal. Good for Grand for addressing an issue that may look political but is deeply moral. We do not condone baby snatching.

Penelope Lemov

Christine, wanted you to know how much I and we value your message. Our statement goes out tomorrow. Breaking families apart has got to stop.

Donna Butts, Generations United

I am the proud granddaughter of four brave people who left Europe, four separate countries, to find the Golden Door that was America. Only one could speak English, my Irish grandfather. Each of the others: Greek, Italian and Romanian (Jew) came, leaving their families and their homes behind. My grandmother told me that as they came in sight of the Statue of Liberty, they all rushed to the deck and wept with joy. “She lifts her lamp beside the golden door.” I am horrified. As a parent, and a grandparent, the idea of wresting children from the arms of their parents, to hear them wailing, terrified. I cannot imagine the terror of those children, the anguish of their parents. I know that this is not supposed to be a political forum, but I know something: Hitler did not kill six million Jews, 20 millions Russians, thousands of gays, cripples, and gypsies. He needed a country to go along with him. In Dante’s Inferno (wrongly attributed to Einstein, but perhaps he said it too): The lowest lever of hell is not for those who do evil, but for those who see evil and say nothing. I keep waiting for some Republicans in Congress to have some heart, some soul, some integrity and dare I say some b…s, to stand up to someone who would be so callus. You know why he is doing this? He wants to trade the lives of these children for his stupid, useless wall. “If our borders are secure, we don’t have to detain the children.” Did you hear how he spoke about people from Central America? They are coming in and “infesting” our country. Once upon a time in Germany, another group of people were likened to insects. Six million died. Another of my heroes, and could you imagine what Jefferson would think if he were here today:

He did say:  I tremble for my country when I reflect that God is just; that his justice cannot sleep forever. What people also forget, right there in the Declaration of Independence: We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.–That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, –That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. 


I agree with you whole-heartedly! This policy decision by our government shows they care more about political wins than about human beings. These actions are definitely not representative of this nation, and they are certainly not consistent with family values. All parents and grandparents’ hearts ache to think of the fear being experienced by the separated children, their moms and dads. Let’s not forget: these families are some of the poorest and most desperate of all. How can we treat them this way?

Catherine Borshuk

Thank you!  My values are to support families and care for children.  Yes, as grandparents these little ones need our support, our voices to speak on their behalf.  Thank you.

Deb Martin – Thoughts become things. Choose the good ones.”

Stay out of it. Do you think the USA can support half of Mexico and Central America?  They had better get control of their countries and improve their lives there. My great grandfather came here at 18 totally alone and never saw a relative again. But he came legally


Thank you for taking a stand. Trump and his goons are creating a third world country. We have to show them that this is America and Americans don’t separate families

I am having trouble sleeping after hearing that audio of those babies. We have to all speak up. The children have no one else.

Linda Amatuzzo

I agree. It is immoral, unnecessary and definitely un-American.

Beth Scott

Thank you so much for taking a stand against the family separation policy.  This cruelty cannot continue.

Pat Vogel

This Zero Tolerance policy is terrible and it must be STOPPED NOW!!! Taking children and nursing babies away from their parents is wrong. It’s such a helpless feeling to know there’s nothing we can do with this inhuman man in he White House. I am an Independent voter but I will never vote for a Republican if this policy doesn’t stop today.

Diane Engle

As a mother, it is definitely heart breaking to see the 2 year old crying as she is separated from her mom. But, it’s not just the separation,  it is the lack of nurturing that every child needs from a mother. There are no females around these children to nurture and comfort them. This is going to traumatize these children and create a group of adults that will never get over this. But, that doesn’t matter to these idiots who make the law. How can the people of the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA allow these children to be abused, and traumatized? Where are the mothers of the men who are separating these children from their mothers. They don’t even have sense enough to provide them with real blankets. Aluminum foil is for cooking, not to be used for covers. Everyone who has abused and traumaized these families, will reap what you sow. God is going to reap coals on your heads, your children’s head, And your children’s head. Your entire generation will suffer, because of the way you have treated these children.

Katerina Deas

Yes, of course we are pro-family but this issue about the immigrants at the border is a political topic and does not belong in this forum, especially when you implore us to contact our political representatives. Next you will be pontificating about women’s rights surrounding abortion.  Whether you are for or against does not belong in this forum. We are a non-political group of women who gather solely for the purpose of enjoying each other’s company, regardless of our personal political leanings.  To be truly fair,  I think you should give equal time to the other way of thinking. Better yet, leave the political issues out. Thank you

Rhonda Young

This is a disgusting policy! What a disgrace!

dorismb2 <dorismb2@comcast.net

This is what I think:  The mainstream media is part of the “machine” that wants to end the Trump Administration.  They have tried many different tactics, but We The People don’t believe the leftist mainstream media anymore.  So now there are multiple sources for news that are explaining this new tactic of the left differently.  Here are two of many, many articles on this subject that can be found in alternative news sources that actually investigate and report on the news, instead of receive their talking points from the powers that be:

Julie Westby

What is happening in our once great nation is criminal, and has had me sickened since trump first hit the scene prior to the election!!  My former congregants/survivors were screaming at me (from the ‘other side’) to do something before we have a repeat of the Holocaust.

Yes, I have called and written to those we call ‘leaders’ for well over two years… to no avail… because they do NOT represent their constituents, but do represent their super pac donors!

At the very least, we can arrest every participating elected official for the blatant crimes of kidnapping and child abuse!!  If dogs were treated this way, the perpetrators would be in jail!!

This is disgusting.  Our lawmakers must act to uphold the law!!!  NOW!!!

Karen Blum

I’m disappointed that you have chosen to align yourself with those who are using this issue as a wedge against the current administration.  The policy of separating children from their parents when the parents try to “illegally” cross the border has been in effect for 22 years.  The current administration has only been in office for a year and a half.  The fact that the previous administration chose to ignore the law in many cases does not change these facts.

While I don’t have a problem with people trying to improve their lives, breaking the law is not the way to do it.  And what lesson are the parents, and people like you trying to send to these children when you choose to ignore laws you don’t approve of?  I keep hearing we are a nation of laws.  Are we truly a nation of laws or are we becoming a nation of law breakers?  Remember, the law breaking doesn’t stop at the border. Those who make it past ICE, get jobs that pay under the table (I.E no income taxes are paid) or they steal someone’s identity in order to obtain a social security number to work.

If you have a problem with the laws as they stand, work to change them.  Don’t play politics and pretend this is a new issue created by the current administration.

Clifford A. Schulze

You write that it is not “political” then provide a link to Senator Sanders.  Not Political?  Really??

In a basic law class in college the professor challenged us with the statement “the law is what the law needs to be”.  If the law is wrong, then it can and should be changed, but it should not be ignored.  I know it is off subject a little bit, but I believe the problems we have with the gun laws today is that they are not enforced – not that we don’t have enough laws, though perhaps existing law needs to be changed.

Duane Bechtold, Former AARP member.

It is extremely sad to see children separated from their parents. It is always heartbreaking to see a child in tears. President Trump has been asking Congress for months to create a law that will allow families who are illegally crossing in to the US to be able to stay together.

Bush and Obama took it upon themselves to not prosecute families who were crossing the border illegally. (Even when Obama kept children with their mothers in jail, while awaiting to go before a judge, there was an outcry, to which he caved.)

Unlike the previous two presidents, Trump is enforcing the law that parents who are arrested for entering illegally cannot keep children with them in jail.  Trump has implored Congress to change the law.  They refuse.   By the way, it is the job of congress to create the law.  It is the job of the president to enforce the law.

Trump ran for presidency promising the people that he would do all he could to not allow terrorists or criminals into the country.  In order to do that he must be vigilant in protecting our borders.  He can’t assume because someone comes across with a child that 1) it is the person’s child and 2) that they aren’t using their children to make it easier to get across.

It is Congress.  So  although you have no political motive I encourage you to you take up the issue with the very people who create the laws.

Tuesday Trump said he does not like to see families separated at the border but that their must be laws to change it as well as to make the borders more secure.

On Monday Trump wrote:  “Why don’t the Democrats give us the votes to fix the world’s worst immigration laws? Where is the outcry for the killings and crime being caused by gangs and thugs, including MS-13, coming into our country illegally? … It is the Democrats fault for being weak and ineffective with Boarder Security and Crime. Tell them to start thinking about the people devastated by Crime coming from illegal immigration. Change the laws!”

The 9th Circuit Court of Appeals ruled in response to a 1997 federal agreement in a case called Flores “that the government either had to release whole families [of illegal immigrants in custody], or that the government had to separate parents from children.”

Asylum seekers who go to proper border crossings are not separated from family members.

The facilities Trump is using are the same facilities Obama used. Laura Bush comparing them to Japanese internment or General Michael Hayden likening it to the Holocaust is irresponsible.

“All our ancestors struggled to build a better life for those who came next. ”  Really?

  • So with that argument you are saying you want anyone to be able to come over to the US.  Because even drug runners and terrorists and law breakers may find a better life in the US than in their homeland.
  • Our ancestors, for the most part, arrived legally.
  • Also, those ancestors brought their culture with them.  But they wanted to assimilate into the US.  They didn’t want to bring their laws in and force them upon the citizens, as many (not all) people want to do and are continually trying to do today.

“How do you hate someone for doing the same?”  Really?

  • Because I want to protect my country, because I want to be vigilant in whom we allow in, because yes, I want to put my country (aka my family) first, “I hate?”  Because I disagree with you I hate those people.  Because I disagree with you I am saying I do not want anyone to come in.  And THAT is most infuriating of all.  Because I disagree with you I hate.

When a stranger comes to my front door I do not automatically let them in.  I find out what they want, who they are, and what their intentions are.  I make sure to the best of my ability that I will remain safe if I let them pass through my door.

How can you hate Americans for doing the same when it comes to wanting to make sure our borders, our doors, remain safe, especially after seeing what has happened to Sweden and Germany, and other European countries who left their borders wide open, without vetting people? (Ahh, see how that “if you disagree with me, you must hate” works?)

It’s good to know that you did not write this article from a political stance or platform and that this was written from the heart and your concern for the children.  I’m sure you will soon write about the families who have been torn apart from the killing done by people entering in the US illegally.

No doubt you will also be writing about the  thousands upon thousands of babies who die each year here in the U.S.  How can a woman, a mother, hate her baby so much that she would put her needs, her wants, “her rights” before a defenseless child and kill her before she has an opportunity to thrive?

I am cancelling my  subscription…I’m sure you don’t want someone to be on the list who “hates people.”

Julie Huffman

Where was your outrage during past presidencies about this issue? This has become yet one more platform of the dump Trump movement!

Joel W. Lasher

I read the original New Yorker article that the quote came from– it is enough to make your stomach roil. This gets my activist dander up!

Dree Hutter

One can only hope you will  bring one or two of these suffering families into your  home until they become established and to bring many others of their relatives to your home so that they can thrive!  (Read with slight snarkeyness).

Edward – clubedorl@aol.com

Christine Crosby

About the author

Christine is the co-founder and editorial director for GRAND Magazine. She is the grandmother of five and great-grandmom (aka Grandmere) to one. She makes her home in St. Petersburg, Florida.

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